Posts Tagged ‘bullshit’

Alien vs Predator

Posted: October 8, 2009 in me
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It’s odd to come home and find everything exactly the way it was when I left.

The other half has been gone to the US since Sunday and so I have a 3-bedroom house all to myself for a few weeks. This leads to all sorts of problems, of course, but there are advantages.

Looking after the dog, by myself, is a distinct problem. He’s needy. I am too, but there’s not much he can do to appease me, if I’m honest. The neighbours, who are there all day, come and take him every so often, but in the evenings it’s a face-off.

“Dinner”, his eyes say. “Give me your dinner”

“I bloody fed you 2 minutes ago”, I snap.

“That wasn’t enough. I want more. I especially want that curry you are eating, not that stale Ryvita you just threw on the floor to try and distract me”, his eyes say.

“Jesus, I’m only in the door half an hour – let me relax”, I plead (yes, with the dog).

“Oh ho. Relax is it? ENTERTAIN ME”, his eyes say.


This can go on for hours.

grass widow

If the whole no-fi/lo-fi thing is a bit too ‘P4k‘ for you then look away now. I’m a big fan. All the bad recording, tinny sound, hard-to-decipher vocals and homemade t-shirts/album covers/everything makes me feel like I’m back in school listening to Bleach again.
There seems to be very few bands from the Captured Tracks/ Slumberland/ Fat Possum stables that are shit these days. Every second week, there’s some lo-fi gem on tour in Europe and, more often than not, Foggy Notions or Skinny Wolves get them upstairs in Whelan’s where they put on brief, wonderful shows and then sell their own t-shirts.We get this with our local bands so it’s great to get it from bands you may only have ever read about on myspace.

As contrived/trendy/uninteresting as some may decry this lo-fi scene as, I love being in a small venue with the band close enough to touch and having them stand beside you in the crowd to check out the support. I love the noisy melodies. I love the brevity. I love the ramshackle performances and the fact that many of them have never been to Europe before. I love the drums.

There’s a rawness to bands like Vivian Girls/Wavves/Times New Viking/Real Estate et al that remains undiluted by hype and combines the nostalgic chill of twee with the pelvic snarl of teenage.

It’s fast, fun and plentiful.

What’s to snipe at? Nowt, that’s what.

Curmudgeons begone.

So now, say hello to Grass Widow, made up of Lillian, Raven and Hannah. They bring you harmonies and fuzz.
Born from the remnants of Shitstorm (the band indie-chick du jour Frankie Rose left to join Vivian Girls, whom she subsequently left to join Crystal Stilts, whom she has now ditched to form Frankie and the Outs…), Grass Widow have a self-titled 12″ LP and a 12″ EP knocking around at the moment.
Have a peep at Captured Tracks for the EP and Make A Mess for the LP.
Here they are covering Black Hole by The Urinals, a major influence in the lo-fi scene.

Grass Widow – Black Hole

And here’s one from their self-titled album.

Grass Widow – To Where

A few things that should be said..

Posted: May 4, 2008 in Uncategorized

*Adrian Chiles, the genial presenter of MOTD2, is the most comforting presence on television I have ever witnessed. He’s even good on The One Show which is, essentially, a bag of shit.

*Rollie ‘Cadence Weapon’ Pemberton is 22 years old and was reviewing music for Pitchfork when he was 18. He’s ridiculously talented. I am bitter.

*Pubs in the countryside {i.e. the really rural Ireland that you only see if you are a)From one of those places or b)In a relationship with someone from one of these places} are often full of people from the area, who have lived there for a long time, usually 25-30 years, who are slightly cracked and get the kind of drunk that makes you go ‘Holy shit, have i ever been that drunk? How is this person not dead?’ Bank holiday weekends only serve to heighten this. It’s an amazing thing to witness.

*Working on bank holiday Monday is a bleak, bleak prospect.

*Zaytoon kebabs are incroyable

That is all.

Read this today

The gist being that Polish Catholic priests are being chastised for plagiarising sermons of other priests, due to the younger generation of smock-wearing God-peddlers having access to t’internet where many sermons in this modern world end up.
Jaysus, isn’t it bad enough being a Catholic priest these days hah? There have been a few stories knocking around about them for a while you know?..
Now they can’t borrow a few thoughts and ruminations from the more experienced members of their ilk (thoughts and ruminations which have been stolen for many moons from the shitting bible!).
They panic on a Saturday night about having nowt to say on Sunday morning and they turn to the web for inspiration, like many students and professionals have been doing for quite some time.
Christ, at least they might find something decent to nick, mightn’t they?
Mass was bad enough in my youth, having to listen to some decaying old gin-skulling virgin lament the state of modern society and cloak his contempt for everyone (except God, naturally) in some deathly dreary parable from whatever chapter of the not-ironically-titled ‘Good Book’ he had drunkenly bookmarked the night before.
Maybe young priests, stealing from the internet, can make those who still go to mass actually feel like they are doing something constructive in church, by perusing a selection of online sermons from their elders and picking something relevant and comprehensible to a younger audience. These people go to church every week. At least reward their efforts by keeping things interesting.
Jesus wept.

Things that are wonderful indeed..

Posted: April 22, 2008 in Uncategorized
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Charlie Brooker.

Elbow at Vicar Street tonight. Guy Garvey is probably the most affable frontman of all time.

Madvillain album. Should have gotten this for my ipod ages ago.

Berocca. Hangover cure to rule them all.

3 days off work midweek. Really looking forward to it.

Wesley willis – alanis morrisette

Does anyone remember the programme?

Filed and delivered. And a bit of Bowerbirds.

Posted: April 14, 2008 in Uncategorized
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Just finished up a feature I’m doing, for the next issue of Film Ireland, on Headrush director Shimmy Marcus and am absolutely wrecked. I’ll assume it’s overflowing with spelling mistakes at this late hour but we shall have to wait and see. On the upside, I have been listening to Bowerbirds’ excellent Hymns for a Dark Horse and half-watched Vampires on TV. Must be the ‘James Woods in 80s clothing’ factor.
I can’t seem to do that hyperlink thing at the moment so the Bowerbirds myspace is Simple enough. Adios.

How to alleviate the shitness of Mondays

Posted: April 7, 2008 in Uncategorized

After a weekend spent in the blustery sunshine of Howth with m’lady, guzzling booze and meeting up with people in a concentrated blitz of ‘doing stuff’ at the weekend, one has then to deal with fucking Monday. As it’s deadline day at work, tis easily the worst day of ’em all. What you need to do on days like this is have stuff arrive to you in the post (The Art Book, Sex Drugs and Cocoa Puffs – the first recommended by the red scrapbook blog, the second by Sinead Gleeson), listen to decent music (The Dodos, Atlas Sound, Bon Iver), drink alot of coffee, read the bits of the paper from yesterday, send messages to people on myspace et al, and think about the gigs on this week (milosh,holy fuck,this will destroy you,maps).Also, you should have done something memorable on Sunday, that you can spend the day mulling over i.e. watched There Will Be Blood and The Assassination of Jesse James again..
Shallow as it may seem, these things do the job. Probably not every week, but some…